I try really hard to avoid discussing love because it is such a touchy subject. But for some reason a thought flew into my head and I started writing this entry. Love is one of those subjects that no one ever seems to come to a consensus on and no one ever seems to know what the hell they are doing. Even those who are typically the go-to people for love advice and relationships have gone through a string of failures when it comes to love.
Seriously, they are. Just go check out Dr. Phil’s track record—I dare you.
It’s interesting to me, because love is one of the only things I can think of which the more you fail at it, the more of an expert you seem to become on the subject. How weird is that? What else does that rule apply to? Would you expect a doctor who has had every single one of his patients die to be a great doctor? Of course not! So why is it that those who have a string of failed relationships are these love and life gurus?
Another thing, no one seems to know what is proper or what is right when it comes to love. How long should you wait to kiss? How long to hold their hand? How long before you have sex? How long before you say I love you? How long before you get married? Should you get married? Is this one the one for me? Why do I feel this way about him/her? No one has a definitive answer.
Then there’s my favorite advice: “go with what your heart says is right.” Possibly the hokiest advice ever, and yet one of the best tidbits you’ll ever hear. Everyone keeps looking for some manual on one of the most complicated human emotions to guide them in the right direction and make sure they don’t fail, but perhaps the key is failing. Maybe trial and error is a crucial part of the process.
I can’t say anything for certain, because everyone is different, and what makes one person happy may not be what another person looks for. But I’ll borrow from the Matrix and say this much: no one can tell you you’re in love, you just know it. So maybe the same applies to the “rules” of love. No one can tell them to you, you just have to “know” them, and maybe that’s why that “go with your heart” phrase is always heard so often.
But then again, I could be wrong.